No Homo: A look into our prejudices

A few years back, Kanye West said, “the opposite of Hip-Hop is gay!” Take our extremely homophobic society coupled with the fact that being a black man and gay is the ultimate taboo, some thought Mr. West was committing career suicide. Well, I’m not saying the opposite of Hip-Hop is gay, I do think however that the issue of homosexuality is a topic that makes many men like myself uncomfortable.

I typically write about issues facing people of color, politics, and music; so where does this no homo topic come in. Is this not an issue facing people of color, is homosexuality not discussed in music, and we all know how it is woven into the fabric of political debates? While blogging and trying to find out more information on how to drive traffic to my blog, I was surfing through necole bitchie’s blog (www.necolebitchie.com). She had a feature that was dealing with this gentleman I had never heard of and some concreteloop website fiasco between the two. So I scrolled through her feature; dealing with how this blogger B. Scott and ConcreteLoop were having issues over people discriminating that ConcreteLoop had enlisted a homosexual as one of their weekly contributors.

Now at this point I don’t know who this man is, and I was actually about to click out of this post because it didn’t affect me personally. Before I left, I clicked the youtube link and low and behold I found out what all the drama had been about. To say I was caught off guard is an understatement; here was this openly gay man looking more like a woman than a lot of women. For me to sugar coat my feelings on what I saw would do this piece no justice, so I give to you my bare honesty. I’m sure I put forth expletives that would not be a delight to the young man’s ears. However, as I thought back to my spirituality, I remembered that I am no better than him and I had no right to judge. So I listened to his message and the content blew me away!

He was reaching out to a young man who had emailed him; and was contemplating suicide because of the ridicule he was receiving from his family and peers because he was gay. A young teenage black man was thinking about killing himself; gay or not, this young man has a world of opportunities to live for and call it naive of me but I was shocked to hear that such ridicule would drive someone so far. So I commend B. Scott for serving as a voice for these young men, inspiring them to be themselves and not allow OUR ridicule of their lifestyle to drive them to an early grave.

But deeper than that, what did this say about me? When talking with some friends about the idea of even posting the video to bring light to this issue facing our communities, it was constantly brought to my attention “Cedric, if you do this people are going to start to wonder about you”. If you didn’t know, the best way to assassinate a straight black man’s character is to call him gay. However, being gay is the new black, please get riled up because I just said that but think about the statement objectively before you lash out. A professor told me once that the plight of homosexuals is very similar to that of the history of blacks here in this country. People use the bible to validate their negative beliefs that these individuals are inferior and have relegated gays to the social outcasts that blacks once were.

I told my best friend what the teacher told me some years ago, he looked at me like I had lost my mind and said that college was getting to me. Was it really that far fetched; just take a look at our country’s constitution? When it was written blacks were not a protected class of people. Right now in 2008 homosexuals are not a protected class of people in the land of the free. I have become no better than the white person who is called a racist and says, “but my best friend is black”. When people say Ced you’re homophobic I say, “nah, I’m not, my cousin is gay”. While I am not homophobic, I recognize that I do have some prejudices towards the gay lifestyle and as someone who has been discriminated against this is unacceptable. I am human though and I admit these flaws, the closer I get to God the more I learn that I have no right to judge anyone and by me judging someone I am opening myself up to have my imperfect life judged.

Barack Obama said that he will look to take away the “don’t ask, don’t tell” policy in the military. I think people like myself have a policy with homosexuals more like “don’t show, don’t care”! I am not one who says, “gays shouldn’t be married, gays shouldn’t be allowed to raise children”. That’s absurd; some of the most competent and intelligent people in this world are gay, so I don’t feel their rights should be limited. However, this don’t show, don’t care policy comes out when we say “oh its ok to be gay but don’t do it around me”. My lifestyle might make some people uncomfortable; they have no right to tell me when and where I can express myself; I’m a grown man unless of course my mom has something to say lol. I say all this to say, watch the young man’s video with an open mind. I wrote this piece in hopes that we can start to have a dialogue in our communities and via the Internet about our prejudices and look to actively tear some of these walls down. If young men are killing themselves because of our ridicule of their lifestyle and we are all right with that, than I think there might not be as much wrong with them as there actually is with us. To minimize the life of another simply because of his/her sexual preference is bigoted hatred at its worst. NO HOMO!

[youtube=http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=J4vB40BRAW0&hl=en]

February 26, 2008

I have set the LORD always before me. Because he is at my right hand, I will not be shaken. Psalm 16:8 NIV

He who belongs to God hears what God says. The reason you do not hear is that you do not belong to God. John 8:47

I read the first verse and it reminded me of how I felt some weeks ago when I read the second verse. Lately faith has been on my mind, the true nature of believing but when I read the message this morning it reminded me of another word; ACTION. I thought about what the passage was saying to me, I asked myself have I set the Lord before me? I must not have because to this very moment there are things that shake me, things that rattle my faith and rack my inner person. I know they are temporary but this still happens, I still get knocked off of my course at times. So then I thought about how I felt when I first read the second verse. I remember feeling like “do I not belong to God” because sometimes I pray and I don’t feel like I get a response. Maybe I did get a response and it wasn’t the response I was looking for but either way I started questioning myself, questioning my beliefs, and if I am truly walking in a better direction. Am I truly building a relationship with God, because I want to hear, I want him to be my right hand so that I will not be shaken.

Well that brings us back to the word ACTION. Only today where we have the drive thru mentality do we expect things instantly! You can not have a 6 pack if you don’t work out. We will not get a promotion at work if we do not perform to a higher standard than what is naturally expected of us. In order to get good grades in school, we labor hard hours of study. Think of this ACTION in the concept of relationships, you have to spend time, communicate, and work towards a common goal. So it is not that God is not our right hand, it is not that we don’t belong to God. You have to pardon me when I say we, if I am putting forth my own weaknesses on you than I apologize but these are the issues that I deal with. However, we have to work at this relationship with God, daily. This is the new workout plan for getting to know God, for beginning to love the God within, beginning to love ourselves. It’s going to take action. I have wanted a six pack for years, never got one though, you know why, I never worked at it consistently. So if I can’t work out one day and get the results I want, what makes me think that I can pray one time, or only pray when I’m down and think that everything is going to be alright. Noooo, there has to be a process, this must become a plan of ACTION, I must continually work on my relationship with the lord to gain a true relationship with him! Lets get together in a spiritual exercise, fellowship is like your buddy system at the gym. Together we can exercise our spiritual muscles, engage our spiritual minds AND MOVE TOWARD HEARING WHAT GOD says to us and not being shaken because he is our right hand. Peace and Grace be unto you!

No one tests the depth of a river with both feet

February 20, 2008

For they that are after the flesh do mind the things of the flesh; but they that are after the spirit the things of the spirit. For to be carnally minded is death; but to be spiritually minded is life and peace. Romans 8:5-6

I had a conversation with someone this weekend and their words inspired me to think a bit deeper on the concept of RELIGION. Then I read this passage this morning and I was wondering what it said to me, what it would mean in my life. For to be carnally minded is death, sometimes the bible speaks in such metaphors that it’s easy to get lost in the interpretation and completely lose the message. It is my understanding that the flesh is more like the concept of sight over faith. Even more when we are committed to the flesh we are not committing ourselves to our spirit within. We can do wrong because we are doing what feels good and not necessarily what is right. To be spiritually minded is to speak with God, to allow him to resonate within you. 

So in a world where being spiritually minded is under attack, I ask myself why is that; why is attempting to know oneself and the creator often shunned upon. Because it has become no different in the minds of those who follow the flesh, who blindly follow a preacher, or whatever they do to keep up with the Jones’. The concept of spirit has left many of us, whenever someone ridicules me for believing in God the first thing they point to is the fallacies within the church. The gossiping, the poor congregation yet the rich pastor, and many other scandals that go on in the church. But my charge to them and us is why are we so engulfed in the ways of a man or a group of people who may be just as much sinners as we are to gain our spirituality. Just because some of the people in my organization are wack does not make my organization wack, it does not make the reason, the principles and my beliefs wack. I think this dilemma that is going on in the world is spoken to with this verse, stop being slaves to the things we see and hear, turn off those negative images and be more concerned with the beautiful image within. Be more concerned with God and the right that he does and how if we are being misrepresented rather than bicker and ridicule, let us find a way to make those things right. So when people attack you because of your beliefs remember they are rooted in the flesh, if you are rooted within the spirit and all of the beautiful blessings that we receive you will continue to receive and as the passage says, life and peace. Peace ad Grace be unto you!

The fool speaks the wise man listens

February 15, 2008

There is therefore now no condemnation to them which are in Christ Jesus, who walk not after the flesh, but after the Spirit. Romans 8:1

All of us live in glass houses and in that breath we should not throw stones. It is not our duty to judge, and when we do judge; the word says that we condemn ourselves. My mother was telling me last night that there is more than one way to the Kingdom of Heaven. Everyone has different beliefs and value systems that they grow up with, from their churches, their parents and their communities about what it means to be of God. The passage above says there will be no condemnation of those who are of Christ, worship Christ, and choose to walk in the spirit rather than the flesh. So just because in my church women are not allowed to wear pants and in yours they are does not make either of us less of a Christian, we are all brothers and sisters in Christ and we must use this family to strengthen us in our time of need, not to divide us. Like yesterday believing in our faith over our sight will propel us further, I pray everyone has a great weekend and let’s remember to not judge. None of us are that holy that we can pass judgment, instead lets continue to fellowship and educate one another, creating a better network of friends through our spirituality and the God within. Peace and Grace be unto you!